Dear Pastor,
This is an open letter
to you and your church. Let me start like this: I am not happy. In fact I am
completely incensed because I have woken up grumpy. Why? Because you lot
decided you wanted a party lasting the whole night.
At 2200, after I
thought I had taken enough, I marched from my house to your church and demanded
that the noise be turned down a bit because I wanted to sleep. Some lackey was
sent to the door to find out what this mad man was going on about. And you know
what he asked me first? "How long have you lived in that house?" Like
it mattered. So, because I am aware of the finer details of the
"house" which is my home I confidently answered "since
1992."
This lackey then had
the audacity to question why I had not been before to complain about the noise.
I said to him that there comes a time when ones patience is broken and action
must be taken. So he then decided to fob me off. He said that the noise would
be turned down within thirty minutes as they were having a "Praise and worship"
session. I said to him that I also want to put in a "sleeping
session" and as it was that late in the night and I had lived there
longer, my expectation was reasonable.
Somehow he managed to placate me and I left, with the noise still on in
the belief that they would see sense and turn it down.
0200AM and they had
connected another amplifier!!! It was like a rock concert in full blast. So
this time I stormed out of my bed with a dark cloud hanging over my head. This
time I was not taking any prisoners. Bang! Bang! I went on the gate. The local
stray dog, Star, with whom I have struck a good relationship also saw the
gravity of the situation and started howling round my feet. The lackey came
again to the gate and that was when I discovered that he was a Pastor from
Hoima.
 |
| Bishop David Oyedepo of Winners Chapel. |
You had decided to have
a knees up with your chums from across the country. And for our discomfort, you
were having this party. He tried to fob me off and this time I had him for dinner!
He knew I was spitting fire so he called the "big man" you, in the
hope that you would intimidate me. I have grown up surrounded by men of the
cloth from the Church Of Uganda and whereas I respect them, I am never
intimidated by them. So you, with the title of "Bishop" was not going
to wash on me. We locked horns straight away to the shock and amazement of all
your other chums the Pastors from across the country. All 20 of you.
This was what was going
on in my mind; Monday night Bishop Ojukwu (not his real names) had invited his
chums round and they were having a ball. Yet they saw it necessary to switch
the loud speakers on. And by the way one of your pastors punctuates his speech
with a "Hallelujah?" every 50 words or so. I asked him to mind his
grammar and speak better. His response? "Amen Brother" I reminded him
we were not brothers at that time.
You see my anger with
Pentecostal churches does not stem from the fact that I am steadfastly an
Episcopalian Christian. No. It is the feeling of entitlement that because you
are worshiping everyone should rejoice with you regardless of the time. And as
observed earlier, most of your flock are not even local to my suburb. They come
from wherever they may live and come and raise the roof on someone else's turf
then they go home leaving us to pick the pieces.
I am not against what
goes on in your church at night. That is for you to worry about. But I ask that
we work together and compromise. Our Christian faith is known for tolerance. I
tolerate your noise during the day (I am not at home anyway) but please let me
have my rest at home. I think that it is incumbent on you to make sure that
people who live within the vicinity of your church get some shut eye. That they
enjoy the fruits of their labor while in the confines of their homes.
God Bless You.
Yours,
Disgruntled neighbor.
mwenky99@gmail.com
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